Marriage SMS

Marriage SMS

Boy friend is fun,
&
Husband is gun,
Boy friend is light of moon,
&
Husband is month of june,
Boy friend is tooty fruity,
&
Husband is qismat phooti.
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Q: If marriages are made in heaven,
than what are made in Hell?
Answer: The days after marriage!
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Before marriage:
Roses are red, sky is blue,
O my darling! I love you…
After Marriage:
Roses are dead,
I have flu,
don’t come near me,
Paray hatt tuu,
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Banta owned a factory.
He issued orders that only married
men would be employed.
Friend asks: Why this ?
Bant reply:
Because married men are more obedient.
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Only true friends stand by u
during bad times.
I promise
I will attend ur wedding.
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The most effective
way 2 remember
ur wife’s birthday
is 2 forget it once.
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Lawyer:What was the first thing your husband
said to you when he woke that morning?
Witness:He said, Where am I, Cathy?
Lawyer:And why did that upset you?
Witness:My name is Susan.
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Why Government do NOT
allow a Man to MARRY 2 Women.
Because per Constitution,
you can NOT BE PUNISHED TWICE
for the same Mistake.
--------------------------
Man at medical store:I need poison
Chemist: I can’t sell you that
Man shows his marriage certificate
.
.
.
Chemist: Oh! sorry,
I didn’t knew u had a prescription.
--------------------------
True relatives always
stand behind u during bad times.
Check ur marriage album.
All your relatives were standing behind u!
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After a quarrel, a husband said to his wife,
You know, I was a fool when I married you.
She replied, Yes dear, I know
but I was in love and didnt notice.
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A person who surrenders when he’s WRONG,
is HONEST.
A person who SURRENDERS when not SURE,
is WISE.
A person who surrenders even if he’s RIGHT,
is a HUSBAND.!
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Man : Is there any way for long life?
Doctor : Get married.
Man : Will it help?
Doctor : No, but the thought of long life will never come.

--------------------------

Q: During Marriage ceremony why is the
bridegroom made to sit on the horse?
A: He is given his last chance to
run away…!!

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A good marriage would be between
a Blind wife and a deaf husband.
Michel de Montaigne.
------------------------------
Telling a lie is
Fault 4 a little boy
an Art 4 a lover
an Accomplishment 4 a bachelor
and a Matter of survival 4 a married man.
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Shadi kernay aur mobile
kharidnay k baad aik hi baat
ka afsos hota hay kaash
thori dair aur ruk jaatay
to acha model mil jata.
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It’s funny when people discuss
LOVE MARRIAGE vs ARRANGED.
It’s like asking someone,
if suicide is better or being murdered.
-----------------------------------
“When a man holds a woman hands?”
When a man holds a woman’s hand
before marriage, it is love;
after marriage it is self-defense.
----------------------------
Man before Marriage is like Airtel….
“Aisi Azaadi Aur Kahaan”
After Marriage He’s Like Hutch…
“Whereever U Go Our Network Follows.”
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What is Marriage?
Ans:
1 year:-Alpenlibe-Ji lalchaye raha Na Jaye.
2 year:- KINETIC-Sab ki hawa Nikal de.
3 year:-CHLORMINT- DOBARA MAT PUCHNA…..
----------------------------
One day a man inserted
an ‘advertisement’ in the
local classifieds: “Wife wanted”.
Next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: “You can have mine.

-----------------------
A little kid asks his Dad,
“Daddy, how much does
it cost to get married?”
“No idea,” replied the Father,
“I’m still paying for it…”
---------------------------------
Grooms, once you marry,
please remember that when
you have a discussion
with your future wife,
always try to get the
last two words in: “Yes dear”
--------------------------
Some people ask the secret
of our long marriage.
We take time to go to a restaurant
two times a week.
A little candlelight, dinner, soft music
and dancing.
She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
---------------------------
Marriage is like going to
a restaurant your choice
from the menu,
And
then look at neighbourin
table n wish you”d ordered that…..
-----------------------------
Why do we all marry?
Because romance is not
the only element of life.
We should also know horror,
terror, suspense, irony,
stupidity & tragedy of LIFE.
--------------------------
First marriage is the triumph of
imagination over intelligence.
Second marriage is the
triumph of hope over experience.
--------------------------------
The Equation of Marriage:
7 Glance = 1 Smile
7 Smile = 1 Meeting
7 Meeting = 1 Kiss
7 Kisses = 1 Proposal
7 Proposal = 1 Marriage -
And that 1 marriage has 77777+ problems.
So beware of glance!
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What a married man says after years of marriage:- My marriage is made of Trust & Understanding, she doesn’t Trust me & I dont Understand her.
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